The Associated Press conducted a poll asking Americans how many Iraqis have died since the invasion in 2003. The median answer given was 9,890. The Americans polled knew the amount of Americans killed, but they lowballed the Iraqi dead by tens of thousands, and that is only by the most conservative of death tolls.
One such toll that has been completely ignored by the mainstream media is one taken by an independent polling agency ORB. ORB is no ultra-left wing research center, it is a trusted credible organization that often works for the conservative wings of the British Government.
They found that around one million Iraqis have been killed. One million. This is a high-end estimate, though just because it is the highest estimate that does not mean it can be dismissed.
Other estimates range from 100,000 to 900,000. Even if this ORB poll is flawed in some way, the fact that the media completely ignored it sickens me.
What if the number is around one million? I hope it isn't, but what if it is? What if our nation, and our nation alone is completely responsible for the slaughter of one million Iraqi citizens?
That no one even talks about Iraqi dead is a crime in itself. All Americans can tell you is how many Americans have died. The number stands at just over four thousand. This is more than the amount killed on September Eleventh 2001.
Yet, we all know the American casualties. The ratio of American deaths to Iraqi deaths, at the high end, is 1 to 200.
One American equals two hundred Iraqis.
How does this make sense to anyone? Have we really become this desensitized to non-American deaths? We have always viewed American deaths as the most important, even in history class. We are taught to believe we are the greatest heroes of world war two, even though the amount we sacrificed to win that war was 418,500. This is a huge amount, though, not as many as the Iraqi War dead estimate by both the ORB poll and the Lancet poll. That was also, at the time, about .32% of our nations population. The nation with the greatest sacrifice to defeat Nazi Germany? The Soviet Union. They suffered a total of 23,100,000 casualties. 13.71% of their population. This is not something we are taught. The Soviet Union was evil, to be sure, but the citizens who died were not.
The were human beings, just like Americans, Germans, and the Japanese. All our lives are equal. American exceptionalism haves you believe we are always the good guys, and that our soldiers are the most heroic.
That our soldiers cause is true, and the cause of the enemy is evil and wrong. A lie.
One million dead, because of us, because of our infallible virtue.
Though, this does not compare to the forgotten genocide of the Native Americans in the country.
We are all human. America has examples of the greatest human triumphs and the greatest evils committed. We are not exceptional. We are the same as all.
I will expand upon this all in my next post, which will be a defense of pacifism.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Quick Question
The movie Fireproof opened this weekend, which is some Christian movie. They do great business here, any christian movie (or even Ben Stein's laugh a minute Expelled) is a gold mine.
The churches got their congregations to go together, and some even had t-shirts.
Now, the movie is about a husband (Kirk Cameron) whose marriage is failing, and he finds that he must restore his relationship with God before he can restore it with his wife. With God, their marriage becomes Fireproof.
And the t-shirts said on the back "Never Leave Your Partner Behind"
My question: Does your wife really count as a "partner" if you believe she should be subservient to you?
The churches got their congregations to go together, and some even had t-shirts.
Now, the movie is about a husband (Kirk Cameron) whose marriage is failing, and he finds that he must restore his relationship with God before he can restore it with his wife. With God, their marriage becomes Fireproof.
And the t-shirts said on the back "Never Leave Your Partner Behind"
My question: Does your wife really count as a "partner" if you believe she should be subservient to you?
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Nationalism
To start off, thank you for your responses! There is still a conversation going in my last post's comment section, thanks to an anonymous poster who helped me see that I let my anger get ahead of my true feelings. Thanks.
Now to the question... What are you first and foremost? Are you an American first or a Human first?
What is more important? Your country or the world as a whole?
Lets not be idealist, we must defend this country right? Damn everyone else, God Bless the U.S.! May He grace us, and his shadow be cast on the rest of the world.
One of our major political parties slogan is "Country First"
Country First. American First. Patriotism at its finest.
What makes us American? Our citizenship? Let's talk about my citizenship.
I was born here. Bam, citizenship for me. Did I choose to be born in this country? No, of course not. I just happened to be, and I just happened to become an American citizen without my knowledge or consent.
So is that what makes us American? What is America? It is a country to be sure. What is a country than? A section of land. A section of land with arbitrary boundaries. Before the lines were drawn was there any difference between this land that we call America and the land we call Canada? Mexico? Climate to be sure, but there are both extremes of weather in this country.
So, me being an American has to do with the land you live on. At its most basic level.
Of course, then we must discuss the U.S. as a nation. I love the freedoms we enjoy to be sure. I wish every nation in the world guaranteed habeas corpus, and the rights granted by our Constitution and it's amendments. These are the good things about my country. Things I love. Things that should be considered normal all around the world.
Of course, then, there is this countries horrible history. The genocide of the Native American. The legacy of slavery. The denial of suffrage to non-white males. The restrictions of freedom that have been cast on us in war time. The internment of Japanese-Americans, the jailing of anti-war protesters in the first world war. The red-scares. The corruption that has been evident throughout our history. The poverty. The pollution. The wars. The hate.
Our country has had a bloody hateful history. This is the history of our democracy. Is this what we are told to love? Regardless of our own feelings. No matter how much you disagree with your leaders, always love this country!
Really? Love a piece of land with invisible boundaries? Love the people who's policies you hate? That you are willing to spend the rest of your life to fight? Love them?
Country first? Why country first? Why not humanity first?
Why not care more about our fellow man no matter where he/she was born than we do for this abstract/intangible idea of a nation.
We have been taught that our country is always right. We have been taught, indoctrinated, since our very first days of school that American lives are inherently more valuable than those born somewhere else, or belonging to another country.
That one American death is worth more than 1000 Iraqi dead.
That we should honor the deaths of our fallen in war but not people our soldiers killed?
At the root of it all, aren't we all just people? My American citizenship is a legal fact, not a personal characteristic.
Don't we all have more in common with all of humanity than with just our fellow Americans?
Those who fight and die for this country are the same who fight and die for another. They just have different ideologies.
They are just doing what they think is right.
They don't think they are murdering another human being.
They are doing their country proud. Their ideology proud.
Nationalism is taught to use throughout our life.
Nationalism is how our government and other governments(and leaders of ideological groups, example: Al-Qaeda) get us to believe that killing a citizen of another nation isn't murder.
It is heroism.
That we are not members of the human race. We are citizens of our countries.
Country First.
God Bless America.
Disclaimer:
I covered some aspects of my pacifism in this post. I don't wish to paint soldiers as murderers. I don't believe they think they are actually murdering people. They do not have this intent. They just want to survive and protect their families. I believe they are misguided.
I don't say these things easily. My grandfather served honorably in the Vietnam War. He is dying of cancer right now. I love him with all of my heart, and I have no malice towards him for serving.
I have more to say about nationalism, but I would like to get responses to this first.
Thank you
With love,
Mark
P.S.
I must give credit where credit is due. Kurt Vonnegut had a lot to do with my turn to pacifism, but so did the wonderful Sarah Goth. She has also strengthened my belief in the cause of peace around the world. Thank you for that.
Now to the question... What are you first and foremost? Are you an American first or a Human first?
What is more important? Your country or the world as a whole?
Lets not be idealist, we must defend this country right? Damn everyone else, God Bless the U.S.! May He grace us, and his shadow be cast on the rest of the world.
One of our major political parties slogan is "Country First"
Country First. American First. Patriotism at its finest.
What makes us American? Our citizenship? Let's talk about my citizenship.
I was born here. Bam, citizenship for me. Did I choose to be born in this country? No, of course not. I just happened to be, and I just happened to become an American citizen without my knowledge or consent.
So is that what makes us American? What is America? It is a country to be sure. What is a country than? A section of land. A section of land with arbitrary boundaries. Before the lines were drawn was there any difference between this land that we call America and the land we call Canada? Mexico? Climate to be sure, but there are both extremes of weather in this country.
So, me being an American has to do with the land you live on. At its most basic level.
Of course, then we must discuss the U.S. as a nation. I love the freedoms we enjoy to be sure. I wish every nation in the world guaranteed habeas corpus, and the rights granted by our Constitution and it's amendments. These are the good things about my country. Things I love. Things that should be considered normal all around the world.
Of course, then, there is this countries horrible history. The genocide of the Native American. The legacy of slavery. The denial of suffrage to non-white males. The restrictions of freedom that have been cast on us in war time. The internment of Japanese-Americans, the jailing of anti-war protesters in the first world war. The red-scares. The corruption that has been evident throughout our history. The poverty. The pollution. The wars. The hate.
Our country has had a bloody hateful history. This is the history of our democracy. Is this what we are told to love? Regardless of our own feelings. No matter how much you disagree with your leaders, always love this country!
Really? Love a piece of land with invisible boundaries? Love the people who's policies you hate? That you are willing to spend the rest of your life to fight? Love them?
Country first? Why country first? Why not humanity first?
Why not care more about our fellow man no matter where he/she was born than we do for this abstract/intangible idea of a nation.
We have been taught that our country is always right. We have been taught, indoctrinated, since our very first days of school that American lives are inherently more valuable than those born somewhere else, or belonging to another country.
That one American death is worth more than 1000 Iraqi dead.
That we should honor the deaths of our fallen in war but not people our soldiers killed?
At the root of it all, aren't we all just people? My American citizenship is a legal fact, not a personal characteristic.
Don't we all have more in common with all of humanity than with just our fellow Americans?
Those who fight and die for this country are the same who fight and die for another. They just have different ideologies.
They are just doing what they think is right.
They don't think they are murdering another human being.
They are doing their country proud. Their ideology proud.
Nationalism is taught to use throughout our life.
Nationalism is how our government and other governments(and leaders of ideological groups, example: Al-Qaeda) get us to believe that killing a citizen of another nation isn't murder.
It is heroism.
That we are not members of the human race. We are citizens of our countries.
Country First.
God Bless America.
Disclaimer:
I covered some aspects of my pacifism in this post. I don't wish to paint soldiers as murderers. I don't believe they think they are actually murdering people. They do not have this intent. They just want to survive and protect their families. I believe they are misguided.
I don't say these things easily. My grandfather served honorably in the Vietnam War. He is dying of cancer right now. I love him with all of my heart, and I have no malice towards him for serving.
I have more to say about nationalism, but I would like to get responses to this first.
Thank you
With love,
Mark
P.S.
I must give credit where credit is due. Kurt Vonnegut had a lot to do with my turn to pacifism, but so did the wonderful Sarah Goth. She has also strengthened my belief in the cause of peace around the world. Thank you for that.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Politics
Politics are making me sick. Physically ill.
I started getting into politics because I had a crazy idea in my head. I thought politics were about issues. Nope. That is the last thing politics is about. What are politics all about?
Personality, race, gender, RELIGION, intelligence, and above all, good-ol' down to earth values.
My stomach hurts, my body shutters, I lose faith in this silly country.
I can't wait to post about nationalism, but thats not what this post is about.
Americans want a President who is like them. Perhaps just as stupid, ignorant, and religious, holds the same prejudices and hatred for certain types of people, and is in-touch with the people.
Not me.
I want my president to be the smartest person possible. I want him or her to someone who would think I am stupid. I don't want my president to talk about religion, ever. I don't give a shit what deity they follow.
Americans want their president to follow their values.
Fuck that. I don't care if my candidate has been married ten times and cheated on every single on of his/her spouse. I don't care where someones penis has been, nor what females do with their vaginas. I just don't think a persons "values" have anything to do with the president they will be. Hell, FDR cheated on his wife, lots. You know who has never cheated on his wife? George W. Bush. Go ahead and bash FDR and praise George Bush, I don't care. FDR did some evil things as well.
Lets talk about Obama and McCain.
I support Obama, though, I disagree with him on most issues. A lot of issues. I hate a lot of the things he believes. Stupid Americans may not like him because he is black, other morons may not like him because they think he is a Muslim.
But, first, why would it be a bad thing if he was a Muslim? Don't you silly Christians realize you share the same God? That Islam, Judaism, and Christianity all come from Abraham?
Why must your candidate be a Christian? Adolf Hitler was a "Christian", but he was as much a Christian as he was a "Socialist". I don't understand it.
Well, you silly people will be happy to know Obama is a Christian, which I don't like about him. That would be the last religion I would want my candidate to be, I would much prefer a Muslim, and even more an atheist. I can't see a non-christian becoming President in my life time. Not in this backwards country.
And you want to discuss his lack of experience? So the fuck what? How much experience did Lincoln have? The American people want the president to be extremely experienced and a dumbass at the same time.
I don't vote on experience. There is only one thing I vote on, and that is issues. I am a liberal, and will vote for whoever is more liberal of the two candidates. Obama is not liberal at all, but he beats McCain.
Here is where I disagree with Obama, and these views will be expanded in upcoming posts:
- Health care- I want a single payer health insurance system. Its that simple.
-Drugs- Obama in most cases wants harsher drug laws, I want all drugs to be legal.
-Gay rights-Obama is against Gay Marriage, I am for it.
-War- Obama is for the war in Afghanistan, I am against all wars. Yeah, I'm a pacifist, an idealist, call me what you like.
Economics- Obama is a fiscal conservative in many ways. I am borderline socialistic, though I believe in a mixed economy. The free-market certainly has its place, and I believe it can solve many things.
-I agree with Obama when it comes to abortion however, so thats good.
- And many more, I'm sure, but I think I should wrap this up.
I started getting into politics because I had a crazy idea in my head. I thought politics were about issues. Nope. That is the last thing politics is about. What are politics all about?
Personality, race, gender, RELIGION, intelligence, and above all, good-ol' down to earth values.
My stomach hurts, my body shutters, I lose faith in this silly country.
I can't wait to post about nationalism, but thats not what this post is about.
Americans want a President who is like them. Perhaps just as stupid, ignorant, and religious, holds the same prejudices and hatred for certain types of people, and is in-touch with the people.
Not me.
I want my president to be the smartest person possible. I want him or her to someone who would think I am stupid. I don't want my president to talk about religion, ever. I don't give a shit what deity they follow.
Americans want their president to follow their values.
Fuck that. I don't care if my candidate has been married ten times and cheated on every single on of his/her spouse. I don't care where someones penis has been, nor what females do with their vaginas. I just don't think a persons "values" have anything to do with the president they will be. Hell, FDR cheated on his wife, lots. You know who has never cheated on his wife? George W. Bush. Go ahead and bash FDR and praise George Bush, I don't care. FDR did some evil things as well.
Lets talk about Obama and McCain.
I support Obama, though, I disagree with him on most issues. A lot of issues. I hate a lot of the things he believes. Stupid Americans may not like him because he is black, other morons may not like him because they think he is a Muslim.
But, first, why would it be a bad thing if he was a Muslim? Don't you silly Christians realize you share the same God? That Islam, Judaism, and Christianity all come from Abraham?
Why must your candidate be a Christian? Adolf Hitler was a "Christian", but he was as much a Christian as he was a "Socialist". I don't understand it.
Well, you silly people will be happy to know Obama is a Christian, which I don't like about him. That would be the last religion I would want my candidate to be, I would much prefer a Muslim, and even more an atheist. I can't see a non-christian becoming President in my life time. Not in this backwards country.
And you want to discuss his lack of experience? So the fuck what? How much experience did Lincoln have? The American people want the president to be extremely experienced and a dumbass at the same time.
I don't vote on experience. There is only one thing I vote on, and that is issues. I am a liberal, and will vote for whoever is more liberal of the two candidates. Obama is not liberal at all, but he beats McCain.
Here is where I disagree with Obama, and these views will be expanded in upcoming posts:
- Health care- I want a single payer health insurance system. Its that simple.
-Drugs- Obama in most cases wants harsher drug laws, I want all drugs to be legal.
-Gay rights-Obama is against Gay Marriage, I am for it.
-War- Obama is for the war in Afghanistan, I am against all wars. Yeah, I'm a pacifist, an idealist, call me what you like.
Economics- Obama is a fiscal conservative in many ways. I am borderline socialistic, though I believe in a mixed economy. The free-market certainly has its place, and I believe it can solve many things.
-I agree with Obama when it comes to abortion however, so thats good.
- And many more, I'm sure, but I think I should wrap this up.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Morality (and lots of question marks)
One of my favorite debates:
Is morality possible without religion?
Certainly. I believe the two are completely independent of one another. Sure, I suppose religion helps enforce morality, but so do laws. Is someone who doesn't break their moral code because they are promised an eternity in heaven more moral than an atheist who also obeys the moral laws of society? I don't think you could make that argument.
Then, people ask, how did morality come about?
Lets say, back in the early development of man, you murder someone in broad daylight. Other humans see this. They will not be your friend. You will not mate, you will not get a share in the food. They don't want to be murdered.
Or perhaps they killed him. Which would be an early and simple idea of morality that stays with us. Eye for an eye. Outdated and barbaric? Perhaps, though we are slowly evolving out of that.
If you stole something or raped someone, the same rules would apply. Though, I don't think they would rape you back as punishment.
What morality are we talking about here? The secular community may have a different set of morals than the religious community.
Like, no sex before marriage. How is this a moral code? If there is consent, how can it be a moral issue? How can consensual sex be judged as wrong or immoral? This is something I don't understand. The risk of spreading sexually transmitted diseases might be part of it, but does that make it a moral issue? There are ways to reduce the chance of transmitting said diseases. Is sex immoral without the intent of conception?
Is anything pleasurable immoral? A sin?
And how is marriage the barrier you must pass to have sex with someone? Is it the idea of eternal commitment? You have to have a ceremony and wear a ring to have sex with someone? Save yourself for the one special someone?
What if you aren't compatable. When you end up having sex it just doesn't feel right. I suppose this would work with the whole evil concept of sex, because you certainly wouldn't want to have it with your spouse.
Why is sex evil anyway? Disgusting even? Why is nudity viewed as the worst thing that can be in a film? Worse than violence even.
Everyone is going to see a naked body at some point, hopefully no one will see a violent murder.
And how is homosexuality immoral, a sin? Because you cannot reproduce? Is reproduction really all it comes down to? Is that the only important thing in religious morality? Perhaps that is why abortion is such a huge issue for the church.
I reject any so called moral codes that have to do with consensual sex. I just don't view it as evil. I have no reverence for sex. I just view it as enjoyable. Ha. This is a very sexual blog. I'll stop that talk now.
What do I view as morality? Any behavior that causes another animal pain. So, do I view eating meat as immoral? Yes. Do I still eat meat? Yes, and often. I don't view myself as a moral person, but I would like to be.
Please feedback. You Christian types, tell me why sex before marriage is so evil! I'd like to know.
Is morality possible without religion?
Certainly. I believe the two are completely independent of one another. Sure, I suppose religion helps enforce morality, but so do laws. Is someone who doesn't break their moral code because they are promised an eternity in heaven more moral than an atheist who also obeys the moral laws of society? I don't think you could make that argument.
Then, people ask, how did morality come about?
Lets say, back in the early development of man, you murder someone in broad daylight. Other humans see this. They will not be your friend. You will not mate, you will not get a share in the food. They don't want to be murdered.
Or perhaps they killed him. Which would be an early and simple idea of morality that stays with us. Eye for an eye. Outdated and barbaric? Perhaps, though we are slowly evolving out of that.
If you stole something or raped someone, the same rules would apply. Though, I don't think they would rape you back as punishment.
What morality are we talking about here? The secular community may have a different set of morals than the religious community.
Like, no sex before marriage. How is this a moral code? If there is consent, how can it be a moral issue? How can consensual sex be judged as wrong or immoral? This is something I don't understand. The risk of spreading sexually transmitted diseases might be part of it, but does that make it a moral issue? There are ways to reduce the chance of transmitting said diseases. Is sex immoral without the intent of conception?
Is anything pleasurable immoral? A sin?
And how is marriage the barrier you must pass to have sex with someone? Is it the idea of eternal commitment? You have to have a ceremony and wear a ring to have sex with someone? Save yourself for the one special someone?
What if you aren't compatable. When you end up having sex it just doesn't feel right. I suppose this would work with the whole evil concept of sex, because you certainly wouldn't want to have it with your spouse.
Why is sex evil anyway? Disgusting even? Why is nudity viewed as the worst thing that can be in a film? Worse than violence even.
Everyone is going to see a naked body at some point, hopefully no one will see a violent murder.
And how is homosexuality immoral, a sin? Because you cannot reproduce? Is reproduction really all it comes down to? Is that the only important thing in religious morality? Perhaps that is why abortion is such a huge issue for the church.
I reject any so called moral codes that have to do with consensual sex. I just don't view it as evil. I have no reverence for sex. I just view it as enjoyable. Ha. This is a very sexual blog. I'll stop that talk now.
What do I view as morality? Any behavior that causes another animal pain. So, do I view eating meat as immoral? Yes. Do I still eat meat? Yes, and often. I don't view myself as a moral person, but I would like to be.
Please feedback. You Christian types, tell me why sex before marriage is so evil! I'd like to know.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Religion-Part Three
So, all that is left to explain our my current religious views. This is certainly the hardest part.
This is the first time I have had trouble writing a blog... Let me start with a simple question to myself.
Do I believe God exists?
No... though, I hesitate to call myself an atheist. I wish I could believe in a god, just not the one I used to believe in. Not an angry and vengeful god, not a god that would wish to exclude people from "heaven" for simply not believing in it's existence. I reject that concept of god.
Do I believe in an afterlife?
No. Though, I wish I did. It sure would comfort me when laying in bed at night, contemplating my mortality.
Listen
I am not anti-religion. I am not someone who will try and prove your faith untrue, or even question it. There is only one person who should question your personal faith, and that is you. You should question everything.
There is only one aspect of Christianity that I like. It is what Jesus said before he was crucified. Churches prefer to focus on Jesus on the cross, and risen-Jesus, but I like the one that lived, as a poor carpenter.
I agree with Kurt Vonnegut on this point. If it were not for the Sermon on the Mount, I wouldn't want to be a human being. If what he said was so nice, what does it matter if he was God or not?
I took a world religions class senior year, and well, that had a lot to do with my not being a Christian anymore. The kinds of things people said concerning this faith that I thought I wanted to follow made me sick. Also, the idea that women should be subservient to men? One of the stupidest things the Bible has to say.
I reject all of that now.
My friend Zac asked me what my least favorite religion was of those that I studied.
I told him Christianity.
My favorite? That would probably have to Buddhism. I love the message of pacifism, and the fact that there is no god in Buddhism. Perhaps one day I should explore it more than I did in those three weeks.
I do enjoy discussing religion, but I'm going to say what I think no matter what your beliefs are. So, please, religion is one of my favorite things to discuss because it makes people so uncomfortable. I think that is mostly because they don't question their own religion, and just accept everything said at church.
Because this blog is short, and lacking what I view as real substance, I'm going to post next about a topic relating to religion, and that is morality.
This is the first time I have had trouble writing a blog... Let me start with a simple question to myself.
Do I believe God exists?
No... though, I hesitate to call myself an atheist. I wish I could believe in a god, just not the one I used to believe in. Not an angry and vengeful god, not a god that would wish to exclude people from "heaven" for simply not believing in it's existence. I reject that concept of god.
Do I believe in an afterlife?
No. Though, I wish I did. It sure would comfort me when laying in bed at night, contemplating my mortality.
Listen
I am not anti-religion. I am not someone who will try and prove your faith untrue, or even question it. There is only one person who should question your personal faith, and that is you. You should question everything.
There is only one aspect of Christianity that I like. It is what Jesus said before he was crucified. Churches prefer to focus on Jesus on the cross, and risen-Jesus, but I like the one that lived, as a poor carpenter.
I agree with Kurt Vonnegut on this point. If it were not for the Sermon on the Mount, I wouldn't want to be a human being. If what he said was so nice, what does it matter if he was God or not?
I took a world religions class senior year, and well, that had a lot to do with my not being a Christian anymore. The kinds of things people said concerning this faith that I thought I wanted to follow made me sick. Also, the idea that women should be subservient to men? One of the stupidest things the Bible has to say.
I reject all of that now.
My friend Zac asked me what my least favorite religion was of those that I studied.
I told him Christianity.
My favorite? That would probably have to Buddhism. I love the message of pacifism, and the fact that there is no god in Buddhism. Perhaps one day I should explore it more than I did in those three weeks.
I do enjoy discussing religion, but I'm going to say what I think no matter what your beliefs are. So, please, religion is one of my favorite things to discuss because it makes people so uncomfortable. I think that is mostly because they don't question their own religion, and just accept everything said at church.
Because this blog is short, and lacking what I view as real substance, I'm going to post next about a topic relating to religion, and that is morality.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Religion-Part Two
I was a member of the religious right, you could definitely say. I was against abortion, though at the time I knew practically nothing about the issue. I hated gay people, though, I didn't know any. I believed in creationism and refused to learn anything about evolution. Thank God, no schools in the area (most likely in this state) actually teach evolution, not in Jr. High, nor in High School. I never learned a thing about evolution because my teachers didn't believe in it. At least, thats what they lead us to believe. I remember first debate about "Under God", this caused me to hate atheist. I couldn't think of a possible reason it should be excluded.
I got in arguments with who didn't hold my beliefs, trying to convert them.
I'm not sure when it happened, but I started changing. No, I'm not talking about puberty, I mean, the way I thought about everything started changing.
Perhaps this is what happens to most people. When you are a child you see everything in terms of black and white, right and wrong. I started seeing the shades of gray.
The first thing to change was my feeling about homosexuals. I stopped hating people because I no longer thought it was a choice. So, I tried to reconcile my new belief with the bible. Without a church to interpret things for me, this was pretty easy, I just had to throw out the old testament.
Jesus never said anything about hating homosexuals, about their inherent evil. Thats all I needed. Abortion was the next to go. Though, all I needed for that was logic, and to do a little research. I listened to arguments on both sides, and realized that no one was for abortion.
I was now pro-choice and didn't hate homosexuals, though I didn't believe that they should be able to marry. I mean, marriage is a religious ceremony right?
Around this time, I started realizing all of my political beliefs fell in the liberal category. This also put me at odds with other "born-again" Christians. Once again, I just had to throw everything out of the bible but the red words. The words of Christ... If I did this, I felt as if His words supported me.
Ah, around this time, my first relationship started. She was also a born-again Christian, though, she attended church. She certainly slowed the development of my religious beliefs. I had someone to reassure me before I could even start doubting the word of God. I even went to her church, and it wasn't too bad, until they started speaking in tongues. I don't know, it weirded me out. It always seemed phony to me as well. I couldn't believe in that. Everything at the church seemed so hollow, so meaningless...
All the rituals, the waving arms in the air, the singing, the dancing, the glossolalia, it seemed like a waste of time. Did this really get you closer to God? I felt closer to God in my own room, alone, with my bible, or in bed at night, having long discussions with God. I read in the bible that you should pray in your room with the door locked... That's what I wanted to do.
Then, I started losing the idea of creationism. The earth is 6,000 years old? Really?
My main argument against evolution was that it was a theory. "They shouldn't teach something that is just a theory in school!" Every time I heard my teacher start teaching about evolution, I waited for the magic words "Evolution is just a theory". I heard those words every time. It was my cue to tune out. It was never on the test anyway, why put something as ridiculous and unproved as a scientific theory on a test?
They didn't point out that gravity was also just a theory.
My faith had started falling apart. It was going quickly. My girlfriend at the time was the only thing holding it up.
This has gotten a bit long, so I think I will have to leave the rest for a third part.
I got in arguments with who didn't hold my beliefs, trying to convert them.
I'm not sure when it happened, but I started changing. No, I'm not talking about puberty, I mean, the way I thought about everything started changing.
Perhaps this is what happens to most people. When you are a child you see everything in terms of black and white, right and wrong. I started seeing the shades of gray.
The first thing to change was my feeling about homosexuals. I stopped hating people because I no longer thought it was a choice. So, I tried to reconcile my new belief with the bible. Without a church to interpret things for me, this was pretty easy, I just had to throw out the old testament.
Jesus never said anything about hating homosexuals, about their inherent evil. Thats all I needed. Abortion was the next to go. Though, all I needed for that was logic, and to do a little research. I listened to arguments on both sides, and realized that no one was for abortion.
I was now pro-choice and didn't hate homosexuals, though I didn't believe that they should be able to marry. I mean, marriage is a religious ceremony right?
Around this time, I started realizing all of my political beliefs fell in the liberal category. This also put me at odds with other "born-again" Christians. Once again, I just had to throw everything out of the bible but the red words. The words of Christ... If I did this, I felt as if His words supported me.
Ah, around this time, my first relationship started. She was also a born-again Christian, though, she attended church. She certainly slowed the development of my religious beliefs. I had someone to reassure me before I could even start doubting the word of God. I even went to her church, and it wasn't too bad, until they started speaking in tongues. I don't know, it weirded me out. It always seemed phony to me as well. I couldn't believe in that. Everything at the church seemed so hollow, so meaningless...
All the rituals, the waving arms in the air, the singing, the dancing, the glossolalia, it seemed like a waste of time. Did this really get you closer to God? I felt closer to God in my own room, alone, with my bible, or in bed at night, having long discussions with God. I read in the bible that you should pray in your room with the door locked... That's what I wanted to do.
Then, I started losing the idea of creationism. The earth is 6,000 years old? Really?
My main argument against evolution was that it was a theory. "They shouldn't teach something that is just a theory in school!" Every time I heard my teacher start teaching about evolution, I waited for the magic words "Evolution is just a theory". I heard those words every time. It was my cue to tune out. It was never on the test anyway, why put something as ridiculous and unproved as a scientific theory on a test?
They didn't point out that gravity was also just a theory.
My faith had started falling apart. It was going quickly. My girlfriend at the time was the only thing holding it up.
This has gotten a bit long, so I think I will have to leave the rest for a third part.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Religion-Part One
I must be pretty ambitious. First real post about religion? Yep. Its something I don't often talk about, so here we go boys and girls.
I've never really gone to church. I mean, I've gone with grandma at Christmas time, or with my friends when they went. But never with my immediate family. God bless my family for that.
I grew up knowing I was a Christian. I just didn't go to church. Thats how we did things. I knew the basic ideas. Jesus died for my sins, and I was going to heaven. Thats all I needed to know.
Until I turned twelve. I started reading "The Left Behind" series. Talk about indoctrinated. That was my drug. Marx said religion is the opiate of the people? Those books were my morphine.
Imagine! Jesus coming back to take all us believers to heaven, and leaving all those heathens on earth to suffer through some pretty horrible (and super cool) tribulations.
Going to heaven without dying! I was all aboard for that idea! Sign me up!
Did I feel odd not going to church? Not at all. This was my church. I bought my own bible, and started reading the old testament.
Then I stopped. Was this really what God was about? Ignore that, I skipped to the New Testament, and read all the red letters.
I was saved. Born again. A Christian who had accepted Jesus into his heart.
In one of these books, one of the characters wanted to have an abortion (She was pregnant with the son of the Anti-Christ, no I'm serious)
I didn't know much about abortion, but I knew I was against it, vehemently. I was ready to go protest.
I mean, what if that was me? About to get aborted?
I had never really gone to church, but I was as Christian as you could get. Hell, not going to church was the only way I could have become this Christian. By myself. That's my way. Self-discovery.
I thought that was the right way to do things, and I still do. Why have another person explain your beliefs? I think you are the best person to discover your own, for yourself.
Thats just me... Part two coming up...
I've never really gone to church. I mean, I've gone with grandma at Christmas time, or with my friends when they went. But never with my immediate family. God bless my family for that.
I grew up knowing I was a Christian. I just didn't go to church. Thats how we did things. I knew the basic ideas. Jesus died for my sins, and I was going to heaven. Thats all I needed to know.
Until I turned twelve. I started reading "The Left Behind" series. Talk about indoctrinated. That was my drug. Marx said religion is the opiate of the people? Those books were my morphine.
Imagine! Jesus coming back to take all us believers to heaven, and leaving all those heathens on earth to suffer through some pretty horrible (and super cool) tribulations.
Going to heaven without dying! I was all aboard for that idea! Sign me up!
Did I feel odd not going to church? Not at all. This was my church. I bought my own bible, and started reading the old testament.
Then I stopped. Was this really what God was about? Ignore that, I skipped to the New Testament, and read all the red letters.
I was saved. Born again. A Christian who had accepted Jesus into his heart.
In one of these books, one of the characters wanted to have an abortion (She was pregnant with the son of the Anti-Christ, no I'm serious)
I didn't know much about abortion, but I knew I was against it, vehemently. I was ready to go protest.
I mean, what if that was me? About to get aborted?
I had never really gone to church, but I was as Christian as you could get. Hell, not going to church was the only way I could have become this Christian. By myself. That's my way. Self-discovery.
I thought that was the right way to do things, and I still do. Why have another person explain your beliefs? I think you are the best person to discover your own, for yourself.
Thats just me... Part two coming up...
Mmmm... Simple...
Yeah, simple black background, really unimaginative name. But oh well.
Right now I am in the USI library, second floor, at one of the tables by the windows. I believe I ruined some couples romantic getaway. I saw them, but knowing I was walking into a corner, I had to keep going, had to sit at the next table. I couldn't just let them and their lovefest ruin my time to myself between classes. Plus, I wanted to get this thing going.
Thank God they are gone (This would be a good segway into my next post, which I intend on being about religion). Making their noises, making me feel awkward, looking back at me after a make out session. Jesus I felt like I didn't belong in this place, but pride kept me here. Knowing that I had just as much right to sit at my favorite spot in the library.
I know I was like that in my relationship, my last one... well, my only one, but thats not a big deal. I learn from these things. Do I change? Of course not. People don't change, they just don't act as stupid the next time.
My last/only relationship was stupid. No really, it was. Man, I never want anything like that again.
Save that for another post though.
Listen, I want to make this blog simple, I want to make it honest, and I want responses when I dig deep into topics I don't discuss much.
I don't expect anyone to read this, but I don't mind if you do. If you barely know me, please go ahead, I have nothing to hide. Comment on my posts, let me get to know you better as well.
My favorite all time quote comes from Kurt Vonnegut(well, his son, but it was in Kurt's book)
"We are here to help each other through this thing, whatever it is"
Gee... Doesn't that just inspire you to hug someone who is sad?
Right now I am in the USI library, second floor, at one of the tables by the windows. I believe I ruined some couples romantic getaway. I saw them, but knowing I was walking into a corner, I had to keep going, had to sit at the next table. I couldn't just let them and their lovefest ruin my time to myself between classes. Plus, I wanted to get this thing going.
Thank God they are gone (This would be a good segway into my next post, which I intend on being about religion). Making their noises, making me feel awkward, looking back at me after a make out session. Jesus I felt like I didn't belong in this place, but pride kept me here. Knowing that I had just as much right to sit at my favorite spot in the library.
I know I was like that in my relationship, my last one... well, my only one, but thats not a big deal. I learn from these things. Do I change? Of course not. People don't change, they just don't act as stupid the next time.
My last/only relationship was stupid. No really, it was. Man, I never want anything like that again.
Save that for another post though.
Listen, I want to make this blog simple, I want to make it honest, and I want responses when I dig deep into topics I don't discuss much.
I don't expect anyone to read this, but I don't mind if you do. If you barely know me, please go ahead, I have nothing to hide. Comment on my posts, let me get to know you better as well.
My favorite all time quote comes from Kurt Vonnegut(well, his son, but it was in Kurt's book)
"We are here to help each other through this thing, whatever it is"
Gee... Doesn't that just inspire you to hug someone who is sad?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
